Bruce Springsteen: A Review

I’ve listened to a painful amount of Bruce Springsteen over the past week. I’m pretty sure my ears are bleeding and the damage done to my cochleas is irreversible, but it’s all for this review: It’s all the same damn thing.

I have many opinions on the state of New Jersey and Bruce Springsteen, and there is video out there somewhere of me using my first amendment right of free speech vehemently against these two premises that unfortunately exist in the United States. Has anything good really come out of New Jersey? How can a state that has a guy who literally endorsed Donald Trump just for the smidgen of a hope that he could be his running mate as governor be taken seriously:

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I know good people who unfortunately hail from New Jersey, but regardless I call for a civil war where only New Jersey secedes from the Union. Don’t even get me started on the Jersey Shore, which makes for an entertaining TV show, but a terrible place to visit. That one episode of It’s Always Sunny hits it right on the head and I recommend you all watch it, season 7, episode 2.

Many claim that Bruce Springsteen is something good that came out of New Jersey, but I disagree. I mean, his music is all the same! Quite possibly the most overrated musician of our times is “The Boss.” The very fact that his nickname is “The Boss” means he’s really not a boss and it’s honestly a little gag-inducing to say, but then again, I should not expect anything more from Jersey. Also, I feel he is very much to blame for guys thinking it’s okay to wear stupid pirate-y earrings.

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But, to the music. “Glory Days” is the anthem for the washed up. “Born to Run” is the fuel for all of those people who say they’re gonna “make it big” and “finally get out” of whatever city or town you live in, but we all know damn well they won’t, and even they probably know it, somewhere deep down. Pretty depressing, but that song is unfortunately often fuel for a dream that continues to be put off.

Has “The Boss” written anything that takes place after his teenage years? Not a single song seems to be about a time after his mid 20s, a dangerous stagnancy and nostalgia filling his words. All his songs tend to involve girls in his past, can we get some more depth, and maybe a bit of the present? His songs are just good for reminiscing about the “good ole days” that really weren’t too good and creating crazy Americana fantasies. I hold Bruce partially responsible for bastardizing the American Dream.

On the plus side, his songs are really good to get drunk to, but if I had to listen to a guy who can’t sing sing, I still pick the artistry that is Bob Dylan any day.

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