Florida Being Florida

Remember how indignant you were when Cecil the lion was killed? No. Think harder. Oh, yes, that’s right. You wanted to kill the guy who did that. Well, it appears a man in Florida thought a better idea would be to steal his boat. Andrew Derwin of Marco island is being charged with grand theft auto for the action.

per Naples Daily News:

The stolen boat that crashed off the southern end of Marco Island on Sunday afternoon belongs to the Minnesota dentist who sparked international fury for killing Cecil the lion last summer, police said.

Andrew Derwin, 26, of Marco Island, was arrested Tuesday on a felony charge of grand theft. Police said he stole and crashed Walter Palmer’s boat off Caxambas Pass.

Officials initially were called to a boat crash at the Caxambas Park Marina.

Marco Island Fire Rescue and Collier County EMS performed first aid. Derwin’s passenger, Nicolas Stolinas, suffered serious injuries when struck by the vessel’s propeller.

Police said they soon learned the boat was stolen and registered to Palmer.

Derwin, Palmer’s neighbor, took the keys to the boat from the rear lanai of Palmer’s home Sunday, according to Marco Island police.

A woman who watches over Palmer’s house told officials the Minnesota dentist left the keys on the lanai for a boat maintenance person to service the vessel. Palmer was supposed to let the woman know when to take the boat keys back inside the house.

The boat is valued at $61,175.

Collier County Sheriff’s Office arrest records state Derwin has been arrested 13 times before on various charges, including driving under the influence, forgery and fleeing from law enforcement. The Sheriff’s Office website states he still was in custody Wednesday, with bail set at $10,000.

Palmer made headlines last July for killing a prized lion while on a hunting trip in Hwange National Park in Zimbabwe.

His Marco Island vacation home was vandalized last August. Someone spray-painted the words “Lion killer!” in blue on the white garage door of the $1.1 million home. The vandals also left at least seven pickled pig’s feet on the home’s driveway near the street.

Here are the big things. This is a story that is focusing on the fact that Palmer killed the lion. But, someone actually got hurt, so that feels more important. Beyond that, how expensive are boats usually? Because $61,175 feels like way too much money. (side note. How much do dentists make? This guy feels way too rich to be just a dentist. I know they make good money, but millionaire money? Fuck outta here with that. No way this dude isn’t into insider trading.) Finally, why? Why do you steal your neighbors boat? You have to know you’ll get caught. You live on an island and probably have your own boat. So, was this just to mess with the lion killer? That’s a silly thing to go to jail for.

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