Curt Schilling to Run For President in 2024

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Curt Schilling is a very important man. He helped save Boston from a curse. Now he plans on running for president in eight years. Considering that no other candidate (that I know of) has ever helped lift a curse, he has my vote. He’s a wildly conservative, and some say bigoted, man who loves memes. Unlike Trump, he’s not as arrogant and he seems to genuinely believe the things he says, so I’d say that’s a slight improvement. And in true Republican presidential candidate form, he already has the liberal media all over him.

When reporting on this story, Sports Illustrated described him as “a perpetually aggrieved Facebook user who once bled from his ankle.” That’s just blasphemy. Schilling didn’t just bleed from his ankle. He bled from his ankle while pitching in Game 6 of the ALCS against the Yankees, bleeding because he just had surgery. He won that game. And then helped the team to win the whole World Series. And then helped them win another one in 2007. I don’t care what his politics are. If you run for president after helping the Red Sox win a World Series, you have my vote.

Schilling/Ortiz 2024.

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